My friend is a housewife and she doesn't clean her house at all....what can i do to help her?

her house has a mildew smell, the couches are stained with food,throwup, juices, soda etc......the carpet is stained with shoe polish and food. the dining table has dried up food on it that has been sitting on it for months almost a year. There's clothes all over the floor, clothes soaked in the bathroom sink, the whole house is unacceptable.


Her husband is in the military and tells her he has to work late or that he can't come home because the base is locked down and he talks crap about her all the time behind her back saying that he sneaks out clubbing and dancing with all these girls, he says that his wife has no life and she needs to do something instead of sitting in the house all day. They have a one year old baby and she says that she doesn't clean because the baby makes her tired. all of this makes me feel bad and I want to help her there is no reason for her to be that filthy.

My friend is a housewife and she doesn't clean her house at all....what can i do to help her?
She needs a lot of help- first of all with her husband. Who said it's HER job to clean the house? Taking care of a baby all day is a LOT of work. It's very hard to have time to keep house AND look after a kid (I know, some of you super moms do it. More power to you). Her husband should be at home supporting his family, not out drinking at bars and fooling around with floozies. Talk to his commanding officer. That nonesense will stop. THE poor lady also sounds like she needs psychiatric counseling.
Reply:She sound like she needs to take charge of her life,no woman/mother should be living like that. There is no exuse, she needs a reality check and some tough love. That's a tough one cause people need to help themselves out b4 they can be helped.
Reply:What you describe is classic depression and her husband is making it worse by leaving her alone. Instead of helping her clean, tell her you will watch her baby (at your house) while she gets psychological help from a professional. Thats the only help that will really Help.
Reply:Get them some pets, the more the merrier.
Reply:I had a similar situation with a co-worker. I offered to go over and help her clean. She accepted and we spent a weekday cleaning her house.
Reply:First - does she WANT help?


If not, she may see you as being completely out of line.


Some people just weren't raised to keep a clean house, and honestly, unless the baby is in danger, it might not be all that big of a deal.


If it bothers you too much, offer to help her. You can offer to keep the baby for a day while she cleans -- or you can offer to clean for her while she watches the baby.


She may not be as impacted by it as you are - or she might actually be too overwhelmed to even know where to start.


You'll never know unless you make the offer.
Reply:I think that you should do something really nice for her,like buy her a gift card or send her some where for a day so that she feels love from someone...and you can probably clean her house while she is gone i think that will really make her day and not feel judged...at list from someone that she appreciates....
Reply:i sort of had the same problem but i had 3 kids,i have 4 now.it took more support and help from my huband,i needed for him to be there for me and give me a break from mommyhood.we developed a system and we worked together 1 day a week to clean,i cleaned myself the rest of the week and had 1 whole day off from kids and cleaning
Reply:that girls got "depression" big time...was she like this before the baby..*post pardum blues ?..she needs a blood work up..take her to the doctor
Reply:Was she like this before her baby? There is a good chance she has post partum depression, and she may have been depressed before she had her baby!





Another possible scenario is that deep down she knows what her husband is doing, and just feels like crap! If "your" husband was doing that and you still really loved him you probably wouldn't feel like doing anything either.





But... if she has a child then she NEEDS to get some help. For starters try to get her to see her Dr. and find out about the Post Partum Depression ~ you also may want to talk to her husband and explain this to him, and if he really loves her he should try to talk to her, also, and get her some help!



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